music, therapy, and me

Today is the second day of this week off, and I am only five weeks away from retirement. I am thinking about what I am going to do next, and things are coming into focus - sorta, kinda, well, it changes all the time. I am hoping that this is something that most retirees go through; the lack of a plan which makes it scary and exhilarating at the same time. I will be sending my pension information to the state offices on Tuesday to get my first pension payment at the end of July. I found a way to get some documents that I need to prove that I am who I am, so I will be sending my information in when the post office opens up again. That is the final step in this pension process, and it was my quest to get it finished before this time but the state of Texas screwed up my document request. Oh well. Here's the start of my plan: I enjoy sharing information with other people, especially with other music therapists. I love making things for music therapists to use to enhance their interactio...

You may be thinking "why May 21st as the start of a new year?" Valid question, but it is the start of my new year. Today is my birthday, and I am being recognized for retiring at the school district breakfast before heading back to work for the last three groups of the regular school year. After tomorrow's training, I will have some time to load up my car and bring more things back here before a week off. After that, I have four weeks of summer school before I am cut loose and ready to move out and move on. So, happy birthday to me, and thank goodness that this year is over! This year has been a challenging for me. It included colon cancer, the removal of about 16 inches of my large intestine (and the removal of my cancer), trips for my sister and mom to help me out with all of that rot, the introduction of new specialists into my medical routine and rotation, and more colonoscopy preparations than anyone should have in a 12-month span. I am ready for a new year of life a...

I was scrolling on my Instagram feed, the way that I do, and saw a post from a teacher speaking about using a kite flying analogy to teach a math concept to her high school students. They did not understand, and the teacher finally realized that it was because her students had never flown kites. She bought a bunch of kites and had the students fly them outside to get that experience. This post made me think a bit about experiences. One of the things that all humans do is assume that their lived experiences are similar to the lived experiences of all humans. In fact, there is a developmental process where children start to be aware of similarities and differences between them, their families, and the families of others. It is easy to assume that every person has flown a kite at least once in their lives, and this assumption also applies to us in the music therapy world. As a vintage music therapist, I have been involved in the music therapy world as both a student and professional for 3...

It is Graduation day at my facility, and we will be celebrating the shift from student to young adult transitioning to the work world for four of our clients today.  Graduation used to be a transition out of the facility and into adult programming, but now we have a transition program, so that doesn't happen as much anymore. In fact, I think that one of our clients will be pretty angry when the realization comes across that this day does not mean leaving and doing what is wanted where and when but means about four more years of potentially being part of the program. The other three students are following similar patterns, but they don't really seem to mind. It is always humbling to be part of this ceremony. It is the one time where I get to see family members of my clients. Isn't that strange? Unfortunately, the music therapist is not someone that is seen during conferences or sought out at other times at my facility. So, this ceremony gives me a glimpse into the family sys...

Oh, reader of mine, I have finished my last Talent Show at my job, and it was a doozy! Not for my performers, but for me! At 10am, my slipped discs moved into absolute pain stage. Things just pinged and were accompanied by sharp, deep pain. Of course, the talent show started at 1:15, so I had to hobble to my desk and request assistance from my big kids to take things down to the gym. Then, none of the speakers worked with the adapters and cords that I had available. We ended up starting 15 minutes later than planned as I tried to get my pain-filled body to and from my music room to the gym more than I originally wanted to get some sort of music system happening. I finally rigged a microphone to the bluetooth speaker, but that's a really poor way to run music. No more! (I am going to order a bluetooth speaker system for the next music therapist to use. I am not going to pay for this one, but it is imperative that the next person does not have to struggle through the things I've ...

Today is the day. Today is the last Talent Show that I will run at my current facility. I have no idea if there will be a Talent Show next year, and I am okay with that thought - mostly. I have sixteen acts to coordinate and one of the students is coordinating a "surprise" for me that I will have to play guitar for... we'll see how it goes. I think I have run at least 29 of these shows. We even did virtual talent shows during COVID. It has been an interesting process of finding how I like to run things to provide my clients with opportunities to show off a bit. There is not one right way to run anything, and I've found that my attitude towards the talent show is that flexibility has to be the key. I've had students freak out about being looked at by everyone in the school and run out to pull the fire alarm. After that happened, the student sent someone to tell me that the student wanted another chance. I did not allow that. Sorry, but putting everyone in potential...

I know my "why." I know why I am leaving a good job after 30 years. I know why I want to move from full-time work to part-time work. I know why I want to work from home for a bit. What I am not quite sure about is "what" I want to do. Now, I am trying really hard to relax into the idea of not having a set plan, but my structure-seeking brain really wants me to know everything in my immediate future. The problem is that I am not exactly sure what I want to do. It is always an interesting situation to have no plan reaching before you. I was this way when I moved here back in July 1996. I knew I was going to graduate school, but I had no idea how I was going to support myself while I was doing that. The TA position I had been told I could have disappeared, so I had to find a way to support myself and my education habit while paying full tuition. The job that I scrambled to find did not start when I needed it to start - there was much turmoil happening at the facility w...

It is Tuesday again, so here is a therapy technique that I use when working with my current crop of children, adolescents, and young adults in a psychiatric residential and day school. Overplanning everything! Sound simple? It really is. For every session that I lead during my workweek, I have about twice the options of therapeutic music experiences (TMEs) available than I actually use. I use my session strategies like a menu. Students come in yelling at each other - that calls for some non-verbal interactions - let's play a game! Students seem exhausted - that calls for some alerting - let's do some stretching and movement. I have my options available for me at any time in the session. This means a bit of strategizing on my part. I have to know the materials that I have available to me during the session time. I hate having to get up to get materials out of cabinets during sessions, so I use my strategy to plan what I might want to use. I have ways that I accomplish this. Most...

Happy Monday. I had another insomnia night where I did not sleep well at all, and now I am going to do five groups and an individual session with less than usual rest. I do not know what I want to do with my students this week, but I will figure something out before the first folks walk into my room at 9am.  I am starting to feel the stress of leaving start to come over me and my ability to do this job. We have two weeks of "regular" school before a break and then our extended school year is starting up. I will tell students about my retirement in June as I am taking things off the walls and out of the cabinets. I expect a mixed bag of emotions and responses from them. I know that I am a mixed bag of emotions myself, but I am swinging towards the "I wish I didn't have to get up and go to work" state of being right now. Knowing that I will be able to sleep when I want and turn over when I have a rough night for a couple of months seems very luxurious. For now, th...

Ah, my primary nemesis, we meet again. Standing in front of you, I feel shame and disappointment in myself - not anger, but the more cutting disappointment. It is entirely my own fault - I set deadlines and timelines and then listen as they whoosh by my head. I have a project that I wanted to get started last month, but that didn't happen, and this month's deadline came and went without any sort of movement towards accomplishing the project. Other things have taken precedent, so I have accomplished other stuff, but that poor project is just sitting there, neglected and crying out for attention. That is my usual pattern with my side job - it gets buried in the mass of things I have to get finished for my main job. Today, I have a bunch of chores to get started and finished surrounding a trip to the theater to see The Devil Wears Prada 2. I have to get multi-vitamins and avocado mash as well as my regular grocery order, then come home and put the groceries away before heading to ...

It is finally Friday, and that means one individual and two groups to go before the weekend is upon me. I am getting ready for a crop night at my local craft store where I will do something for the time that we are going to be there. I have to go straight after work, so I have to figure out what I will need to take with me before I leave. I am up to two boxes and a backpack to lug out to my car and transport to and from work before using it all tonight. These are the types of things that keep me going when I am needing a creative boost. This evening will be hosted by the craft store, but we can work on anything we want to work on - with 15% off any purchases all night! I have done one of these already, and I am looking forward to this one. Before I get there, though, I have to get through my last two groups and that individual session. It is also the deadline for talent show submissions, and I only have three submissions so far. I will cancel if I don't get more people interested. ...

Happy Thursday, all. It is time to think a bit about stuff going on in the music therapy world - well, at least stuff that I know about. I am no longer a member of the American Music Therapy Association. This is my second year of not paying membership dues, but I still get all the emails and announcements. I was thinking about my separation from this organization yesterday because a job that I felt I would be good at but ultimately decided not to apply for was filled and announced. I have a little bit of jealousy about someone else getting this position, but I am also relieved that I did not apply. I left the organization because it was feeling less like a professional advocacy organization promoting music therapy for persons we serve and more like a political action organization demanding socio-political changes in the greater world. I do not feel like a professional organization should be making political statements about situations that are not directly related to the profession. No...

I am tired. This probably doesn't surprise you as it appears to be a recurring theme on this blog, but I am. We have seventeen days before kids start their summer break. Thirteen days of work between now and week off and then I have sixteen more days of work before I am finished. I received my exit paperwork in the mail yesterday. I have information about my final paycheck and an exit interview survey as well as some information about Cobra. I have an interview with an insurance broker to see if I can get health insurance from the government site starting on July 1, There are all sorts of things that are now on my to-do list that weren't there two days ago, so I have lots to get done. My students are exhausting right now. There isn't a day when everyone is content and happy to be in music therapy. I have had to sing over screaming for a long time now, and it is so difficult to navigate loud students. Most of the issues that have happened started outside of music therapy and...

It is Tuesday, so let's talk about a therapy technique that I have used over my many years as a music therapist. That's right. It is  Therapy Technique Tuesday !!  Today's technique is the negotiable/non-negotiable threshold. Are you ready?? I work with adolescents. My adolescents are very angry when boundaries and expectations are placed upon them. When they get angry, my adolescents tend to become aggressive, confrontational, and just plain mean. As a result, over the past thirty some odd years, I have learned to offer choices for things that just do not really matter to how music therapy sessions work. I call these my negotiables. The things that do matter are my non-negotiables.  Non-negotiables include anything that will harm self, others, or property. Non-negotiables also include how we speak to others, even when we are escalated or angry. These non-negotiables are things that I have to keep under control due to safety needs and requirements. Other things are comple...

I wrote on both Thursday and Friday last week, but I didn't post on the blog. I do that sometimes, especially when what I am writing about is either too personal or too negative for my tastes. So, the past four days have just been time for resting and getting sick AGAIN! This time around, I have to get antibiotics early so I don't end up losing more money due to illness. This is Star Wars week, and I am ready to share my love of these movies with my students for the last time at my current job! I have new R2D2 Crocs to wear with my various Star Wars shirts. To say that I am a Star Wars fan is a pablum type way to describe my love of this franchise. I have a Star Wars bathroom that is accessed via a Star Wars hallway. I have posters and toys and Doorables and puzzle pictures and all sorts of things that I have collected over the years. What is in the hallway is just a small bit of my collection. It is finally time to share this with students again. I am exhausted and not really ...