music, therapy, and me

Ah. Today is deadline day, and I did NOT do any composing yesterday. My self-imposed deadline is gonna whoosh on by me unless I get going on it!  That's the problem with having no outside influences working on my deadlines. The only person who knows that I want to release things on the 5th and the 22nd is me -- well, and now you. I picked these dates randomly so there is no reason why I have to stick to those calendar dates other than I like structure to my days and my life. There you go. So, since I did not do my composition work yesterday, it is waiting for me today. I did manage to complete my other priority tasks on my planner entry, but composition just did not occur. I did not just fritter my time away, however. I sorted my permanent markers and put them into color sets into bags. I am feeling good about getting some of my stuff rearranged and sorted. That has freed up a little bit of space down here, and I am looking forward to getting more space to move and relax. Don't...

I had a bit of an adventurous day yesterday. I sat down with my journal to think about my current way of setting goals and not setting goals and wanting a bit more guidance than what I currently have available and realizing that my past ways of establishing goals have not helped me out at all and just generally thinking about lots of existential stuff. I think I have decided to do a different type of goal system - more task oriented and focused because I tend to do these types of things a bit more consistently than aspirational goals. So, I fell back into my habit of writing some goals, but I am hoping that I will be a bit more motivated to do some of these things with a different type of system and focus. We will see in three months... After I finished the journal work, I went out into the world to see another house. As I was waiting for my realtor to get the key out of the key box, I felt a sharp pain on my left upper arm. I whipped my head around to see a wasp-type thing flying off ...

I want to do so many things that I just can't seem to start or finish. It is somewhat disheartening to constantly have the ideas but not the resources (time being the biggest resource that I want to have and do not use wisely) to do all the things on my list of to-do's. So, I keep writing my ideas down and chip away at all the ideas every once in a while. I would like to have an income that allows me to stay at home and accomplish all these ideas, but I didn't win either of the large lottery amounts this week (I didn't even get a ticket), so I will head back into my full-time and part-time jobs to work for my living and try to scrape some time and interest into getting some of those ideas off the page and into reality. Perhaps I should spend some of my money to buy an occasional lottery ticket. There is just something about dreaming that is only satisfying to a point - after that, you need to put your dreams into a bit of reality. One thing that I have managed to bring ...