Life Moves On

I am tired.

This probably doesn't surprise you as it appears to be a recurring theme on this blog, but I am.

We have seventeen days before kids start their summer break. Thirteen days of work between now and week off and then I have sixteen more days of work before I am finished. I received my exit paperwork in the mail yesterday. I have information about my final paycheck and an exit interview survey as well as some information about Cobra. I have an interview with an insurance broker to see if I can get health insurance from the government site starting on July 1, There are all sorts of things that are now on my to-do list that weren't there two days ago, so I have lots to get done.

My students are exhausting right now. There isn't a day when everyone is content and happy to be in music therapy. I have had to sing over screaming for a long time now, and it is so difficult to navigate loud students. Most of the issues that have happened started outside of music therapy and just bloomed into tantrums once the students have arrived in the session. I don't feel good, so I do not have the patience that I usually display. As a result, the assistance team has been in my room often in the past three weeks. That is not usually the case, and I am tired of not being able to do my job.

I have not told my students that I am leaving yet. I plan on doing that in June. I do not know if my successor will be overlapping with me at all, so I am unsure if I should start telling them now or if I will be alone until my last contract day. I am really hoping for the latter, but I will be the last person to know these details. I probably won't be told until the person shows up in my classroom, ready to figure out how music therapy has worked at my facility for the last 30 years.

I need a reset.

Let's start with my attitude. 

Students are comfortable expressing negative emotions around me because they know that I will do my best to keep them safe, even when they are not in control of their emotions.

I am leaving this position of my own choice. 

I am excited about what is ahead of me.

I will navigate this change in my life the way I have made it through all of the other major changes in my existence up until now. 

This next year will be one of change and brainstorming and exploration and metamorphosis (my word for this year). 

I am looking forward to a life where I do not have to risk my physical health to keep aggressive students safe. 

I am looking forward to quiet, calm interactions with humans.

I am now going to start my morning routine, head off into the world where gas is now almost twice what it was four months ago, and deal with the human beings that are in my music therapy room however they need me to deal with them and their emotions.

Life moves on...