Waking Up My Brain

One thing about me is that I have degenerating discs in my back. For this, I take medication to help me with the pain, and that medication has interesting neurological side effects that include difficulty focusing my eyes. As such, I cannot drive a car until these side effects wear off.

Today, I am feeling the side effects later than usual because I had to take my medication off my usual schedule. As you know, reader of mine, I tend to do better with a schedule than without one, so the change in medication time affected this morning's thinking and functioning. I am now getting to the point where I can feel my brain waking up and becoming more focused. It is a strange feeling, but one that I experience every morning.

Last night, I went to the crop at my local craft store (I love these experiences). It had a different feel than the others that I have been to, but it was nice to sit down and try to prod my brain into creation. I am in the middle of making several books, but I am tired of bookmaking. I left after 4.5 hours because I ran out of things to do. I am going back today in about an hour, and I have found some more things to make for the rest of the day. I have to take my materials so I can make cards and then decorate them all.

My biggest problem is that I get to a part in my crafting process where I have to go to where my materials are before I can finish projects. Today's card making marathon will have to stop when I need to add finishing touches to the cards before they are finished. I will not be able to finish them all because I have limited ability to carry things to and from. I am not wanting to take more than I need for these events, so I like to have a plan before I go.

Some of the women bring wagons loaded with stuff to use. I don't want to end up doing that - it seems to be too much wear and tear on my body, but I like the idea of having my die cut machine and all my die cuts. I cannot carry those by myself, so that is a place where having a wagon would be helpful.

So what does this have to do with music, therapy, and me? It is completely in the "me" part of this blog. Paper crafting is something I do that does not have anything to do with my profession, and it is something that challenges me. I enjoy taking a piece of pretty paper and making it into something else.

When I get to these crops, though, everything that I know about making things with paper gets wiped from my mind if I do not enter with a strategy.

Does that sound familiar to any of you music therapists out there?

I see a difference between a plan and a strategy. For me, the definitions of these two words differ in how you approach a problem. Plan always feels like protocols or scripts rather than strategies which feel like possibilities for me. When I enter a session with a music therapy client, I bring in the strategies that I know work with clients. I might have specific songs planned, but how I use them is where the strategizing comes in. I might change the elements of music to reflect what the client brings into the session. I might abandon my planned songs completely based on how the client interacts with me and the music. I might use the same song several different ways during our time together.

This way of thinking about music therapy has helped me figure out how to be more client responsive - I think, at least. The ability to use my strategies to change the music environment and shared experience allows me to adapt the music to my client every moment we are together. Being client-focused and human-centric is at the core of how I want to be a music therapist.

As a paper crafter, I find that I approach my craft with more of a plan and less of a strategy. I wonder what would happen if I tried to shift my brain from "I have to plan everything so I can get everything finished" to "let's just see what happens if I do this..."

Then my brain goes into reactive mode and starts sending "what if" thoughts. "What if I don't have what I need in the middle of my exploration? Won't that just make me feel frustrated?" "What if I mess up and have to throw the entire thing away?" (FYI, that has happened more than once.) "What if I need more than what is available?" 
Those thoughts just show up again and again. 

These intrusive thoughts often change my ideas from exploring to hugging the shore line.

It is time to start the process of getting ready to crop. I have my stuff assembled, and it is time...

See you tomorrow.