Stimulating the Brain Cells - One By One

My brain is fried.

I have been using this phrase lots lately as I seem to be in a slump of some sort - creative, writing, thinking critically type of slump. I had a job offer for a job that I decided I didn't want, and the guilt of turning them down is wearing on me. I have no clear idea what day it is from moment to moment, and I keep trying to make it be Friday instead of Thursday.

Lots is going on but is still not going on.

I have another interview on Monday for a job outside my usual category but adjacent to my preferred population. The job I turned down was with my preferred population but required things that I no longer want to do with my life, so after some agonizing nights, I finally decided that I needed to just release myself and them from the expectation that I would take the job. I didn't fancy the idea of working full-time in the residences just so I could afford healthcare. That is a difficult job and one that I am not sure I can do these days.

So, I let them know that I was rejecting the offer yesterday. I hope that the internal applicant that was second on the list is told today that they have a new job! I am going to be trying my best to get ready for my next interview for an executive assistant position. The only thing I am lacking is experience as an assistant, but they seemed interested in my clinical background and offered the interview, so here I go!

My brain cells are still. They are sitting in my brain just lazing around. There is no connection and there is no movement, and I do not like this situation at all. I strive to be creative and seeking new information and constantly researching things that interest me. 

Right now, nothing is interesting me.

I have not finished several library books recently because they just didn't capture my attention. That is unheard of in my world. I do not fail to finish books in my life. I read them until the end - but not recently. I turned one in on Tuesday that I just didn't find interesting. I think I would have in a different place in my lifespan, but not right now. My newest book is a bit more interesting, but I am still not all that interested in reading.

For a life-long reader, this disinterest in books is just plain old sad.

I decided to change my sleeping arrangement this week. I have two big beds in my house, and I have been sleeping downstairs for most of the year. I decided to move upstairs on Sunday and am now sitting on the big bed upstairs, taking advantage of my wi-fi and laptop as I am writing this post. I tried to write at my desk downstairs, but the words just didn't come to me.

Oh, those stagnant brain cells are just so hard to stimulate these days.

It is time to stir them up. I need something out of my routine to make my brain move. The first thing I am going to do is make something to eat. Today is my "eat the points" day, so I can eat what I want when I want rather than having to count every calorie to stay within my allowed points. The next thing is to make something new - trying my best to create something. I might write a chapter in my fiction project that I started a couple of years ago. After that, I might try for a nap. I have an intern webinar to run this evening, so I need to be downstairs for that event this evening. Before that, though, I have time to fill and brain cells to stimulate!

Let's see if anything comes from this day...