Wednesday Woes

Here I am, sitting in my cool house and complaining about things. It is time for a RANT, people, and here we go!

(If you are new here, there are times when I just start writing whatever I can and all the things that I am thinking, feeling, and trying to figure out. Today seems to be one of those days, so here it goes...)

I am tired. I am crabby. I am time-zone lagged, and it is showing in my patterns and routines. I am not going to sleep when I usually sleep, and I am waking up groggy and cranky. I blame this on my recent travels and the lack of rest that I got when driving and flying and driving again. I will try to nap today, but thoughts about what I "should" be doing keep me from resting - there's that SHOULDA goblin again...

I have not been to the library since I took out a bunch of books that I did not read. I overestimated my interest in reading before my trip, so I had books that I did not even open. I now have so many books to read that I really cannot justify another trip to the library at the moment. That makes me both happy and sad because the library is one of my happy places. I just bought two brand new books at full price and several at thrift book prices, so I really need to decrease my to be read pile before I can head down to the local library to get more books to read.

The good news is that I assembled some shelving for music therapy resources yesterday and started to fill them as well! I now have a place to put my mother's dollhouse rooms on display, so I will be bringing up the various pieces that she made for me to put into those rooms. This is a big accomplishment for me. While I was putting the shelving together, I also did two loads of laundry that is waiting for me to fold and put away, but progress has been made!

I need a job of some sort. That is one of the thoughts that circle around my brain over and over again right now. Lots of fun!

It is going to rain here - again - my front yard is a mud puddle, and the gutters need to be cleared out. That, of course, takes money, so it will have to wait a bit (see the paragraph above...).

I am already tired of politics, and I have insulated myself so much from the forkwits that are out there. I am being constantly harangued by pollsters - block, block, block. I am also sick of seeing commercials on YouTube for politicians, so I am not watching YouTube right now. The rest of my streaming services do not include commercials for outside interests, so I am able to keep away from the negativity.

I did enjoy watching Jack Smith clips from yesterday's exercise in stupidity (not Mr. Smith's!).

Today, I have no coherent plan. I have not set up my planner for the day, but I will need to do some marketing and then work a bit on my website upgrade. I have finished the work I need to do for the Online Conference for Music Therapy, so that can be checked off the list! (There are only 127 days left until the next OCMT!!)

Meanwhile, I have a bunch of ideas to share with the music therapy community. I just have to do them! Time to get hopping on it all!!

I have some things to get done and more to think about than I have the bandwidth to process. That's okay because I will get everything figured out - eventually.

Okay, my brain is focusing more on positives than negatives right now, and that's a good thing for my mental health but does not really make this a rant, does it?

I am hungry.

I am exhausted.

I am unemployed.

I need so little, yet I want so much! Time to start working on it all.

I have a furnace check scheduled for Friday, so I have to make it easy to navigate my home for the furnace person. That's something for today and tomorrow while I am anxiously awaiting the intern webinars that I will be starting up Thursday evening. I have plenty to do around here and very little interest in any of it!

So, I have decided that I am NOT going to stress myself about getting things done. If things are finished, then they are finished. If not, then that's okay. When I go out, I will ask for job application links and get that process started. For now, though, I am going to do more laundry (towels today), make some food, and then put more things onto the new shelves. What gets done will get done. What doesn't get done will get done eventually. No rushing - no hurrying - no worrying. It will work out.

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