Fun Friday After a Sleepy Thursday

It is 6:38 am, and there is a bird chirping loudly and repetitively outside my home. We had a thunderstorm this morning, so everything is wet and somewhat cool outside. There may be more storms in the near future, so I guess the bird is just communicating as much as possible before the next round shows up. I am feeling like I am being a slacker right now, not working, and trying my best not to engage in these feelings of uselessness and FOMO.

I want to spend some time upstairs today, sorting through and cleaning up my stuff. I have storage items coming tomorrow to help with that process. I want to be able to walk around my upstairs without having to step over things. I also need to spend some time on marketing and printing out materials for Creativity Camp which will happen next weekend. I also need to take a shower and make my bed with clean sheets. Lots of things I need to do. We will see how much I actually get done today.

Yesterday was spent mostly in napping. I worked a bit on one of the themed journals until I found that I have placed my bookbinding needles someplace other than where they belong. I was unable to continue to stitch my signatures into the cover that I created, so I just gave up. I have a new set of needles coming tomorrow, so that project can be continued at that point. I will put those needles into the place where they belong - one of the storage pouches that I am also getting delivered tomorrow! 

I love it when a plan comes together!

Anyway, after I finished playing with paper, I decided that I needed to take a nap and proceeded to sleep off and on for the next four hours. That, of course, interrupted my bedtime routine, so I ended up playing games on my phone while rewatching my first Korean drama until about 11pm (VERY late for me). 

This morning, I woke up at 4:45 am which is about my usual time. I am feeling pretty peppy today - probably because my mother is concerned that I am depressed right now due to my sleeping. It is a valid concern as I tend to be more depressed during the summer heat and humidity, but I didn't sleep because I felt depressed. I slept because I was tired.

There are other things that I am experiencing that are signs of depression, but they are also signs of someone who is burnt out and figuring out new ways to live life. I am trying to work through these feelings and not wallow too much in the fact that it is hot outside and that my hair never dries completely. This feels different, and it is helped by the fact that I am now jobless.

The new music therapist at my old job contacted me yesterday with a couple of questions. I answered them and then moved on. This was after my nap, so it did not contribute to any sort of fatigue or feelings or depression. I now know that person's name and a bit about their background. I hope that they will enjoy the job as much as I did, but I have to move on into my next life.

Today's fun is going to be in trying to figure out where some things need to go. There will be a bit of telling myself, "It's okay to throw things away" as I look at the abundance that I have in front of me. There will be lots more of the thought, "I might use this in my music therapy future." That's how I continue to be conned into thinking that I will have a music therapy future that is different from the one I have at this very moment...

My current music therapy future is looking pretty good. I have Creativity Camp next weekend and Rhythm to Results in August. These conferences/workshops are a passion project of mine, so it is exhilarating to see them come to fruition in the next couple of months. I am working on some subscription box ideas as well as some digital resources to share with other music therapy clinicians. I just need to figure out how to get the resources out there to the rest of the music therapy community.

That is the part of all of this that I don't do well, but I am learning. It is time to start my upstairs day with a shower first, and then some breakfast. See you tomorrow.

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