Two Years

For most people, seeing the title of this post, the mind goes immediately to the situation that happened in our government on January 6th, but for my family, this is the anniversary of my Dad's death - on my Mom's birthday.

We are forever reminded of these things. It is difficult to figure out how to celebrate one very important person on the same day when we lost the other important person.

We try to do our best to honor everyone on January 7th.

This year, my mother's birthday gift is sitting on my kitchen floor where my suitcase is awaiting a trip. If I had been able to get home, she would have her gift. She will get it in March along with my sister's birthday gifts and all the Christmas gifts. I just booked that flight - let's see if it actually happens when it is supposed to...

My focus for this day has to be a look forward rather than a look back. I know my Dad wouldn't want us to wallow in sackcloth and ashes. He died almost the way he wanted, and I know that when he died, he was ready to go. My phone calls with my family this week have been centered around grief processing. We have found that many of our friends and acquaintances go through their processes differently. Not better, not worse - just differently. So, we have been talking about it. So, I am going to cry a bit, and then spend some time making things and spending my day off in ways that make me feel happiness.

There will be noodles tomorrow. Today, there might be some shopping and some baking and some sandwich making. Or, there may only be some crafting and lots of television watching in store for me on my one day off per week. We will see. I never know at the start of this part of the week how things will go.