Grief - Revisited

I woke up late this morning and then found news that the husband of another friend has passed away. This friend also lost her father earlier this year, so she now has to figure out how to move forward in a world where she does not have her husband either. This is my second friend to lose her husband and then face being a single mother to a boy and a girl. My heart hurts for all of them, but it hurts more for the kids.

My father died on January 7, 2021. I had 50 years of life with my father. I miss him every day and so much more when others go through grief due to the loss of their own fathers. I know what it is like to think about sharing something with him and then not be able to share that because he is no longer present on this world. I had 50 years. The children that I know did not have that type of time.

Now, I know that they do not know the difference. They just know that their Dads are gone now. They will miss the presence of those Dads for a very long time. I mourn the opportunities lost - for them and for me as well.

Every

Single

Time

Someone

Else

Goes

Through

This.

The loss of my Dad was preceded by the loss of my cat and before the loss of my cousin. From December 25, 2020 through August 11, 2021, we had so much change. Our lives were rocked with each loss, and it felt like there was no end in sight. My family has now become different, and we continue to adjust to those differences.

I mourn for me, for the children of my friends, and for my friends who have lost husbands and partners in the process of raising those children. I know what my Mom had to go through to get the finances settled and to change things into her control rather than shared control. She had to sort through lots of things in a time of grief. Many people wanted information immediately - things that we could not accommodate because of how her state processes death certificates. The process of grieving is often interrupted by practicalities but that offer more issues and questions that cannot be answered.

It is time to work through that grief in a temporary manner - I have to work today - but I will revisit it again when there is time to go through it all. My friends and their children will remain in my thoughts. I believe that mutual thought adds energy into the universe that affects that same universe in imperceptible manners but that add up. The more we send out positive and supportive thoughts to others, the more energy we send into the universe.

Peace, friends.