Summertime Blues
I'm in a funk.
I found out that an acquaintance passed away two days ago and it sent me into a downward spiral. I know that some of this is due to my current hormone levels, some of it is due to all of the other things going on in the lives of my loved ones, and some if it is because this is the third person who has passed away just recently. Some of it also may be because of the full moon.
I spent all day yesterday in bed, alternating between sleeping and crying.
This type of funk is something that happens every once in a while, and more often to me in the summer months than in the winter months. I tend to have more of these types of incidents during the summer session than during the rest of the school year. These incidents lead me to hibernate more during the hot summer months than at other times. I also tend to isolate myself more. It is time to change some of these patterns into things that are a bit more healthy.
I have never liked the summertime. When I was little, my mom would ask me to go outside for a walk. My response? "Nope, sun's out." I had to be forced to go outside to play during the long summer days in California. Once out, I would be fine, but the act of going out was not something that I wanted to do. I am still this way, but Mom isn't here to force me outside. I also don't have a large area to roam around in like I did at home. There is a small porch area outside my home, but the door sticks and I don't have anything out there but weeds. There is also a community pool, but I don't know anyone in the community. I have all sorts of excuses on why I can't go out, but not lots of incentive to actually go out.
Today, I will spend time out of bed. I will clean something. I will cook something (I've already started that process - Grandma's chili is good food for a funk). I will create something. I will remember my client, my former co-worker, and my friend. I may cry a bit, but I will keep moving. I may go outside. I may not.
Time for those summertime blues.
I found out that an acquaintance passed away two days ago and it sent me into a downward spiral. I know that some of this is due to my current hormone levels, some of it is due to all of the other things going on in the lives of my loved ones, and some if it is because this is the third person who has passed away just recently. Some of it also may be because of the full moon.
I spent all day yesterday in bed, alternating between sleeping and crying.
This type of funk is something that happens every once in a while, and more often to me in the summer months than in the winter months. I tend to have more of these types of incidents during the summer session than during the rest of the school year. These incidents lead me to hibernate more during the hot summer months than at other times. I also tend to isolate myself more. It is time to change some of these patterns into things that are a bit more healthy.
I have never liked the summertime. When I was little, my mom would ask me to go outside for a walk. My response? "Nope, sun's out." I had to be forced to go outside to play during the long summer days in California. Once out, I would be fine, but the act of going out was not something that I wanted to do. I am still this way, but Mom isn't here to force me outside. I also don't have a large area to roam around in like I did at home. There is a small porch area outside my home, but the door sticks and I don't have anything out there but weeds. There is also a community pool, but I don't know anyone in the community. I have all sorts of excuses on why I can't go out, but not lots of incentive to actually go out.
Today, I will spend time out of bed. I will clean something. I will cook something (I've already started that process - Grandma's chili is good food for a funk). I will create something. I will remember my client, my former co-worker, and my friend. I may cry a bit, but I will keep moving. I may go outside. I may not.
Time for those summertime blues.
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