Thoughtful Thursday: What I Am

Today is my day for thinking.

You might think that it is strange to have a day set aside for thinking, but that's how my current medication regimen is going - Thursdays are the days where I have more medication involvement happening later due to a delayed dosage on Wednesday evenings. As a result of my schedule and my medications, I have to take a bit more time on Thursday mornings before I get into my car and hurtle down the road to work.

So, I set Thursdays aside for thinking.

This open-ended type of post theme allows me to go wherever my brain takes me in my writing moments. I often start off without a theme in mind, and then something comes up. Right now, I am working on sorting through all sorts of thoughts on all sorts of topics and situations - most of which I cannot change or control.

Jazz band seems to be going great. We have had lots of discussions about music preference opinions and allowing others to hold opinions different from our own. We have worked on our auditory discrimination skills through instrument identification. We have also had a chance to play instruments that we don't always play. It has been a pretty good week so far. Let's hope that the next two days will also work as successfully.

I have time today to start my session strategy for next week. Since it is a split week (two months in the same week), I usually do something technology-based during this time. I have no idea what to do, but I will think of something, I am sure. I have lots of time tomorrow for strategizing, arranging visuals, and rearranging my storage room. I don't know if I will be able to do it because my back is twinging again, but that is what I want to happen. I want to be able to access the drum set without having to assemble and disassemble it every time a client wants it to happen. That means having to move things from one area of the room to the other, so I need to get going on that. That task, though, is for tomorrow when my medication is taken at the usual time, and I have less side effects happening when I am at work.

I am finding that I am spiraling downwards at the moment. Today is the full moon, we have a dense fog advisory, and I am just don't want to leave my home. There is no good news out there, and I am easily drawn into the big events that are happening far away with me. I have to avoid things like the news because I get too angry and then have to figure out ways to express that anger in a healthy manner rather than stuffing my emotions. Today, I am struggling with that separation and am not doing a good job of expressing things in a healthy manner.

I have a Zoom hangout with my friends this evening. We do this every so often, and I love finding out what is going on in their lives. I've known them for a very long time, and we just fall into friendship again after absences. I spent the day with one of these friends right before my mom went into the hospital during my most recent break. We don't see each other much, but we are doing these Zoom things which is great. I want more of those types of connections in my life. My brain is starting to wake up, so it is almost time to head out into the world.

My quest for today is to get to work safely, finish my case work, move instruments a bit, and start my session strategy for next week. I will then come home, make some dinner, and get ready to talk to my friends. It will be another later-than-usual night, but I will make that sacrifice for these people in my life (tongue firmly in cheek here). Of course, I might not make much sense during the meeting, but that's what happens when we meet late for me and after work for them...

Cheers, all!