Stepping Into the Unknown

One of my favorite pieces of music is Into the Unknown by Panic at the Disco. This is the piece that is in the end credits of the movie, Frozen 2, and it strikes a chord with me in ways that I find difficult to explain. I mean, I like the version that Idina Menzel sings in the movie, but this is the version that energizes every cell in my body.

I am trying my best to step into the unknown this year. It is part of my interpretation of my word of the year, Transform. I am making an effort to do things that either I have never done or that I have been putting off. So, here it goes.

I found out this weekend that I have been accepted to present a continuing music therapy education (CMTE) course on one of my passion topics - competency-based clinical training. Now, I just need to have five people sign up and then it's a go! I was accepted to do a workshop at the World Congress of Music Therapy in July this year on another of my passion projects - the future of music therapy. I am starting to get back into a presentation mode, which is something I gave up for a couple of years after leaving AMTA committee leadership and not participating much in the AMTA world lately. It is nice to be accepted for some information sharing during this season in my life.

I have stepped out of some of my comfort zones lately to apply for a job that is not something I would usually apply for but that would be perfect for me at this time in my life. I am still waiting to hear about my application. The job was supposed to start two weeks ago, and there has been nothing from any of the parties involved. I am wondering what to do next - I don't want to be pushy, but I need to know if there is any sort of movement on this situation. A part of my life is on hold while I am waiting for the actions of others. This is not a state of being that I like much at all, but I am trying new things - patience being one of them. Obviously, the timeline of the other parties is not moving as fast as mine.

I started a project last night that I have been thinking about doing for a very long time. I was almost finished when my sister called, so I will have to finish things up tomorrow evening. This is the first step towards my latest big audacious goal for music therapy students and interns. There will be more to it, but I took the first step last night. Tomorrow will be the second first step. I am feeling excited about this - another step into the unknown.

My goal, in all of this, is to change the parts of my life that do not suit me into things that do.

I have to say, as far as life goes, this is a pretty good place to be in right now. I have a home. I am settling into the changes that come along with being a homeowner. I have lots of difficulty with putting holes in the wall. Too many years of being a renter, I guess. My house is a mess because I am home-poor, and I can't spend lots (especially with THRIEE trips to go on this year!! THREE!). I am settling, though. I am finding nooks and storage and furniture from various places and places to put things up in my rooms. I am finding my style of decorating - still very much just whatever goes where it goes - very little thematic decorating. There are things that I have around me because they were given to me by friends and my family members. There are things that I keep because I love them. I have the opportunity to indulge in my various fandoms and interests. My craft table is a mess. My desk is a mess. My bedrooms are messes. Everything is a mess, and there are still WAY too many boxes for my liking. I am working on containment right now, trying to transform my current living area into "home."

So, transforming my house into my "home" is one of my largest goals for this year. It is time for everything to have a place and for me to throw out what no longer works for me. I am working on making new things for myself and for others. I am exercising my brain and challenging my own concepts through reading and exploration. I am also staying firmly rooted in things that work for me.

I was watching one of my all-time favorite shows, Dharma and Greg on Amazon Prime last week, and realized that my current state of being human was shaped by watching that show so very long ago. I am becoming a crone, and I am enjoying that fact. There is something nice about becoming something new. I also know that I have to embrace the things that are happening to my body because these things are inevitable - denying their existence will not make them go away, so why not embrace the transformation and step into the unknown. 

I think I need to go listen to that song again.

It is Wednesday.

Imagine me singing, "Into the unknown" in the above picture. I'll edit it soon to include this little detail pretty soon - just have to wait until after today since it is time to head out into the rain to get to my busiest day of the work week. Here I go.

Into the unknown...