Thoughtful Thursday: There Are Times When I Just Can't Share

Yesterday, I sat down at my computer and wrote a post that will never be published on this page.

This happens sometimes, and I allow myself to write and then decide whether the topic is something that other people need to know about. Usually, the posts that are not published but still live on in my drafts folder fall into two categories - whinging about things that other people just don't want to read about or rants that are so over the top and full of strong emotion that they present a picture of me that I am not proud to share with others. I keep those posts to myself.

Today is not one of those days. I want to acknowledge that the world of being a music therapist is not all beautiful singing and major breakthroughs. There are times when being a music therapist is just plain old hard. 

One of my friends posted a comment on facebook yesterday that there are times when administrators just do not understand what we do. The comment was centered around exposure to bodily fluids when working with clients and that music therapists do not come in contact... Ha! While I have not had to clean up urine or a bowel movement this week (well...yet - there are still two more days of the week), I have had quite a bit of contact with runny noses this week - my own and that of others as allergy season is in full bloom around here. I come in contact with bodily fluids on a regular basis. I think other music therapists would agree that bodily fluids are just part of working with other humans. The saliva alone...good thing that spit doesn't make me queasy. Now vomit...that's another story.

I have often found a disconnect between what people think I do versus what I actually do. I usually look upon these situations as an opportunity to do some advocacy about music therapy and how things work in the music therapy session. My own father didn't really understand various parts of my job until he experienced a music therapy session as a client - all he kept saying to me was, "she just sat down and started playing the guitar! Just like that!!" My favorite part of that conversation was hearing my sister in the background shouting, "Duh, Dad! That's what Mary Jane does EVERY DAY!" It just cracks me up to remember that.

The disconnect between expectation and reality extends into how we, as music therapists, expect that our jobs will go. I think we often have a picture of being a miracle worker when we leave school and move into our professional work. We are immersed in the intricacies and wonder of music. I often find interns and students who are convinced that music will heal all issues that a person brings into a music therapy session. While having that sort of perspective is wonderful, I have found that it is not always true. 

The simple fact of all of this is that music is not for everyone. Not everyone out there wants to pay someone any sort of fee for singing, guitar play, and the therapeutic process behind that music. Being a music therapist is not easy. It takes gumption, constant advocacy, and the ability to compromise to be a music therapist in this country.

Now, I have been employed as a music therapist for 28 of my 29 years of being a music therapist. I had a couple of related jobs before I found my first music therapy job. I have been through good situations and bad situations in my life as a professional music therapist. There have been times when I wanted to leave jobs and just go do something that did not require much peopling. There have also been times when my love for music and people is deepened to the point where I cannot imagine every doing anything else. The benefit of being a long-lived music therapist is that I have weathered all sorts of situations and am still dedicated to doing what I do.

I think that part of the reason why we have so few music therapists in this country partially stems from unrealistic expectations of entry-level professionals about the job. I think we focus on the wonder of the job more than the realities of the job. When our newly graduated folks head out into the world to get their first jobs, I think they are often surprised by the rigors of being a professional. I think we do not always do a good job of preparing music therapy students and interns for what the job really entails.

Like cleaning up after someone throws up all over your gathering drum.

I wonder if there would be any interest in a student webinar that talks about some of these things - the realities of being a music therapist. I could call it - Being a Music Therapist - It's Not All Happy People Making Happy Sounds. Would that scare music therapy students away from the profession? Would it encourage people to stay because they would know that these types of things were just part of being a human who works with other humans? Who knows??

I am heading off into my professional world today to watch my interns run two groups and to lead one group myself. The groups that we have on Thursdays are usually pretty receptive to music therapy, so I anticipate that there will be more music therapy moments than disappointments, but I never know what will transpire in my sessions from day to day. Whatever happens today, I know that I will try my best to be a good human and will encourage my interns to do the same. We will work with and for the humans who come into our music therapy space. We will try our best to navigate the world that we inhabit - come what may.

Happy Thursday, all!