The First Time I've...
Today is Easter Sunday. and it is the first time in a very long time that I have not been in church on this Sunday. In fact, it may be the first time I have not been in church on this Sunday. I can't remember an Easter when I haven't been part of an Easter celebration.
This is strange for me. My spirituality is a part of my being in this world, and it is strange not to be getting up early to go to a sunrise service or to sing traditional music with others on this day. Of all the traditions of my particular brand of spiritual belief, the Good Friday service is my favorite. I've come to understand that Easter cannot happen unless Good Friday happens. I love the ceremony of Holy Week, and I've missed that remembrance of the ritual this week.
On the other hand, this is the first Holy Week in a couple of decades where I have not been absolutely exhausted by Easter!!
There are good and bad things about all of this.
So, this may be the first time that I've ever missed an Easter celebration. I may have missed a couple in college, but I don't think so since my grandmother lived near and would NOT have stood for my missing Easter, but it is possible. I am trying to figure out my own celebration here at home with limited interaction and very little impetus to celebrate.
I have lit a candle in this murky, gloomy, wet morning. Its light reminds me that the light overcomes the darkness - always. I can be mindful and find bits of peace when I look at that candle flame.
Today needs to be a mindful day for me. I need to be able to just be in the midst of Easter and pandemics and hormones and things I need to get done and things I've already done. In all the time that I have to do things, I am not able to do those things for some strange reason.
I am a trauma-informed music therapist. I have been to the trainings, and I am certified to help others learn about being a trauma-informed therapist. I have studied trauma, secondary trauma, vicarious trauma, generational trauma, and societal trauma. My rational brain knows that much of what is going on right now is going to have a traumatic effect on everyone. I can sense the effect of this on myself now.
My pet has arrived at my desk, seeking affection in the form of nuzzles, purrs, kisses, and closeness.
This offers an opportunity for mindfulness that I need to take advantage of, so I am going to close here for some purring and snuggles.
This is strange for me. My spirituality is a part of my being in this world, and it is strange not to be getting up early to go to a sunrise service or to sing traditional music with others on this day. Of all the traditions of my particular brand of spiritual belief, the Good Friday service is my favorite. I've come to understand that Easter cannot happen unless Good Friday happens. I love the ceremony of Holy Week, and I've missed that remembrance of the ritual this week.
On the other hand, this is the first Holy Week in a couple of decades where I have not been absolutely exhausted by Easter!!
There are good and bad things about all of this.
So, this may be the first time that I've ever missed an Easter celebration. I may have missed a couple in college, but I don't think so since my grandmother lived near and would NOT have stood for my missing Easter, but it is possible. I am trying to figure out my own celebration here at home with limited interaction and very little impetus to celebrate.
I have lit a candle in this murky, gloomy, wet morning. Its light reminds me that the light overcomes the darkness - always. I can be mindful and find bits of peace when I look at that candle flame.
Today needs to be a mindful day for me. I need to be able to just be in the midst of Easter and pandemics and hormones and things I need to get done and things I've already done. In all the time that I have to do things, I am not able to do those things for some strange reason.
I am a trauma-informed music therapist. I have been to the trainings, and I am certified to help others learn about being a trauma-informed therapist. I have studied trauma, secondary trauma, vicarious trauma, generational trauma, and societal trauma. My rational brain knows that much of what is going on right now is going to have a traumatic effect on everyone. I can sense the effect of this on myself now.
My pet has arrived at my desk, seeking affection in the form of nuzzles, purrs, kisses, and closeness.
This offers an opportunity for mindfulness that I need to take advantage of, so I am going to close here for some purring and snuggles.
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