Thoughtful Thursday: It's NOT Just Me!

I've been struggling this week with being positive, connecting with clients, trying to keep my mind on the rational side of things rather than just going straight into emotional overload, and with pretty much every thing else - sleep, eating, interest in anything, getting enough energy to take a shower, and all sorts of other stuff. I also am having a strange craving for chili-spaghetti, but that means a trip to the grocery store after work which I avoid at all cost because of the crush of people that just have to get their ingredients as well, so my cravings are going unsatisfied which means that they are growing and growing.

So, I was sitting with some co-workers before a meeting yesterday, listening to them talk as I tend to do, and they were talking about their own struggles happening this week. Many of the same things kept coming up (not chili-spaghetti, but that's life! They don't know what they're missing...).

It's kind of strange, but my struggles felt so much less than they did moments before. 

Struggles shared are often struggles diminished - at least for me. I never remember this fact when going through periods of struggling with various things, but it is true. This is one of the reasons that I participate in peer supervision. It is pretty good to hear that my frustrations are not only my frustrations (all the time, at least - sometimes they are owned by me alone!) and that many of us are sharing the same types of frustrations.

There is a conversation going on in one of my social media feeds about therapists having to participate in psychotherapy in order to be therapists. I am not sure that I agree with making this a requirement - at least, not simply psychotherapy - I agree wholeheartedly that supervision/consultation is an essential for being a therapist - I disagree that specifically psychotherapy is warranted for every person in the helping professions. I have been in therapy before and my therapist kept asking me why I was there. She told me over and over again that I was doing everything that she would have suggested and that our time together was less about therapy and more simply about me just talking to someone who would listen. As I recall, I did most of the talking during our time together. 

I think the conversation that is happening is fueled by some differences in vocabulary. Some folks are insistent that psychoanalysis is the only pathway to being a therapist. Others quail at the thought of requiring therapy and the connotations that the word "therapy" has in various communities. I tend to fall more on the latter side than on the former side, by the way. I think it is a bit hypocritical to eschew the thought of therapy for a therapist - I mean, after all, we want others to engage in therapy, so why not ourselves? - but I think of therapy as something time-limited and linked to specific concerns or situations rather than just something that you do because you have to. 

I'm not sure I would get my money's worth out of an analyst.

I can and do get my money's worth out of my peer supervision sessions. We talk about clients, about the job challenges and benefits, about relationships with clients and co-workers, we analyze situations, and we just connect as colleagues. We listen to each other and process through events as they happen - as a team. This is a valuable process for me - so much more valuable than my experience in psychoanalysis. 

I know that others will disagree with me - vehemently - but my opinions are just that - mine and opinions. I figure that each of us needs to find what works for us. If supervision is more effective and appropriate for me than psychoanalysis, then isn't that what is important? Effectiveness??

I am heading into this Thursday morning with a sense of exhaustion and frustration but also knowing that it is not just me. There are other things at work in my part of the world that is not just centered in the music therapy room but is all over my facility. There is strength in that thought, and I am feeling so much better about my own existence in my bit of the world because I know that I am not alone in my feelings.

It's NOT just me!