Watching Others to Learn More
I admit, I can be the person who just stares at strangers when out in public. I prefer it when I am outside and can watch others from behind my Dollar Tree sunglasses, but I am that person. I observe.
I spent the morning at my local Firestone shop getting the tires rotated and the oil changed in my car. Then, I went to the Dollar Tree and shopped a bit. I had a chance to observe other human beings interacting with each other.
I love the opportunity to watch people interact. Today, in the hour I spent with the folks at the tire store, I saw interactions that ranged from the familiar to the friendly. The front office folks were friendly to all of us, but there were definitely some folks that had more of a relationship formed with customer and staff. Those folks were greeted by name, joshed around with a bit, and greeted with a clap on the shoulder. The rest of us were greeted with a smile, a friendly greeting, and some light conversation about our cars.
After my car was finished, I took myself to the Dollar Tree. I love that store. When I arrived, there were no cars in the parking lot (extremely unusual). There were two employees sitting outside, smoking, and as I walked towards the store, another car drove up. An older woman (one of the type that I want to be when I grow up) popped out of the car, walked jauntily to the door, turned and looked at me and said, "I wanted to be first." She then laughed, put her arm around me, and invited me to enter the store with her. I did so. Her interaction was contagious. When I checked out, she was right in front of me and asked if she needed to stay until I was finished. We laughed. She waved to me when her car was leaving and I was walking to mine. Instant connection - brief though it was, it was important.
I watch others to see how they interact with the world. It helps me to figure out how to approach my own world. It also helps me to work with my clients who don't always interact in predictable ways.
One of the things that I've noticed during my people-watching habits over the years is that "we" as a society tend to get snippy when "we" think "we" are not getting our way. The best place to see this type of rude, snippy behavior is at the airport gate.
Have you ever noticed that "we" all take any type of interruption to our travel extremely personally? My last trips were in February 2015, and all of my flights had some sort of delay or complication. The gate agent would say something like, "Ladies and gentlemen, our gate has changed. Please proceed to gate 45 for our flight." Then, everyone would start complaining, going up to the gate and complaining that "we" had to walk. It wasn't right. "We" were inconvenienced, and it was the end of the world.
I usually try to stop by the gate and thank the gate agent for making sure that "we" knew the information that "we" needed to know to get to our destination. They smile tiredly, but you can tell that's it never enough to help assuage the attitude that "we" project for something that is not that agent's fault.
This thought process invades my interactions with my clients. Many times, my clients respond and react to things that are not within my control to fix. Often, those things are not things that the client can control or fix either. At those moments, it's important to remember that civility doesn't take much effort and can help to find a solution without inflating a situation any more.
I know that it's difficult to always remain civil, especially when I am frustrated, but it's the way I can contribute to the world. Calm in the face of frustration, working towards making the change I want to see in the world, and being kind to those who convey information but do not make the decisions. I take out my frustrations here on my blog - lucky you!! (Imagine a smiley face emoticon here - your choice of which one you want to imagine.)
I hope to go to the lake tomorrow for a bit of time. If there are other people there, I will watch what they do. If not, I will enjoy the serenity.
Be kind, folks. Save your angst and ire for those who truly need it, not for the person who has to tell you something you don't want to hear. That's it. End of rant...
I spent the morning at my local Firestone shop getting the tires rotated and the oil changed in my car. Then, I went to the Dollar Tree and shopped a bit. I had a chance to observe other human beings interacting with each other.
I love the opportunity to watch people interact. Today, in the hour I spent with the folks at the tire store, I saw interactions that ranged from the familiar to the friendly. The front office folks were friendly to all of us, but there were definitely some folks that had more of a relationship formed with customer and staff. Those folks were greeted by name, joshed around with a bit, and greeted with a clap on the shoulder. The rest of us were greeted with a smile, a friendly greeting, and some light conversation about our cars.
After my car was finished, I took myself to the Dollar Tree. I love that store. When I arrived, there were no cars in the parking lot (extremely unusual). There were two employees sitting outside, smoking, and as I walked towards the store, another car drove up. An older woman (one of the type that I want to be when I grow up) popped out of the car, walked jauntily to the door, turned and looked at me and said, "I wanted to be first." She then laughed, put her arm around me, and invited me to enter the store with her. I did so. Her interaction was contagious. When I checked out, she was right in front of me and asked if she needed to stay until I was finished. We laughed. She waved to me when her car was leaving and I was walking to mine. Instant connection - brief though it was, it was important.
I watch others to see how they interact with the world. It helps me to figure out how to approach my own world. It also helps me to work with my clients who don't always interact in predictable ways.
One of the things that I've noticed during my people-watching habits over the years is that "we" as a society tend to get snippy when "we" think "we" are not getting our way. The best place to see this type of rude, snippy behavior is at the airport gate.
Have you ever noticed that "we" all take any type of interruption to our travel extremely personally? My last trips were in February 2015, and all of my flights had some sort of delay or complication. The gate agent would say something like, "Ladies and gentlemen, our gate has changed. Please proceed to gate 45 for our flight." Then, everyone would start complaining, going up to the gate and complaining that "we" had to walk. It wasn't right. "We" were inconvenienced, and it was the end of the world.
I usually try to stop by the gate and thank the gate agent for making sure that "we" knew the information that "we" needed to know to get to our destination. They smile tiredly, but you can tell that's it never enough to help assuage the attitude that "we" project for something that is not that agent's fault.
This thought process invades my interactions with my clients. Many times, my clients respond and react to things that are not within my control to fix. Often, those things are not things that the client can control or fix either. At those moments, it's important to remember that civility doesn't take much effort and can help to find a solution without inflating a situation any more.
I know that it's difficult to always remain civil, especially when I am frustrated, but it's the way I can contribute to the world. Calm in the face of frustration, working towards making the change I want to see in the world, and being kind to those who convey information but do not make the decisions. I take out my frustrations here on my blog - lucky you!! (Imagine a smiley face emoticon here - your choice of which one you want to imagine.)
I hope to go to the lake tomorrow for a bit of time. If there are other people there, I will watch what they do. If not, I will enjoy the serenity.
Be kind, folks. Save your angst and ire for those who truly need it, not for the person who has to tell you something you don't want to hear. That's it. End of rant...
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