I Need A Break
Well, yesterday was a comedy of errors. You know the type of day when everything is just a bit off? That was my yesterday.
It started with my blog post about the Wednesday group that I always dread. Writing about it was a bit cathartic - it allowed me to spend some time thinking through my various strategies. I toddled off to work with good expectations for the day.
I should have known that something was up when I pulled into the gas station. The prices at my gas station are less than the gas stations in the town I work, so I always try to fill up at home. The station is a little bit out of my way, but not so much that it doesn't make sense to get gasoline there. I pulled into the station and took note of the price - $2.66 per gallon (I know that there are some folks out there thinking that is expensive and many more who are thinking, "$2.66 a gallon? Where is that? That's a GREAT price!!"). I started the transaction. As I chose my gasoline, I noticed the price on the pump was $2.97. I double-checked the price on the sign, then looked at the pump again. I cancelled the transaction and then went to another pump. Same thing. I think I ruined the day of the person who was working there, but she needed to know that there was a difference (it's illegal to advertise one price and charge another). I left and went to another station about 20 miles away from my home. I paid a little bit more, but not 30 cents more a gallon!
I am doing bus duty solo this week. Bus duty is one of those "other duties as assigned" that happens when you don't have a classroom full of children at 8:00am. During the school year, we have 5 people who do bus duty. During summer school, we have 2 of us. My bus duty partner is currently on vacation, so, this week, there is me. 37 kids, 20 buses, 20 minutes, and me. To add to my stresses (real and imagined), my badge only works occasionally - I think it thinks that I've accessed the building too much and then wants to keep me out of the building for my own safety...or sanity...I'm not sure which! So, I am standing outside the building with four students (approximately half of whom, during this particular trip, did not want to go to school) calling on the walkie talkie for someone to open the door and let us in. (If I can wait 5 minutes, I can get back in by myself, but I cannot have my students waiting for 5 minutes while the technology catches up.) Of course, no one is actually listening to the walkie talkies, so I am standing there pounding on the door trying to keep kids calm, interested in walking into the building, and trying to stay positive through all of this.
Then came sessions. I can't even start to talk about that. I'm thinking that the building heat and humidity is creeping into our ways of relating to each other in not-so-good ways. Kids screamed, kids tried to break things, kids required assistance to be safe. It was exhausting.
I had to finish my therapy day sitting in a meeting. If you know anything about me, you should know that meetings are not my favorite things to do. Even the meetings I chair are not just "sit there and listen" type meetings. There are things to do, tasks, and treats! There were none of those things during this meeting.
I left right after the meeting. Nothing on the iPod fit my mood. I spent lots of time trying to find something to assist me in mood vectoring, but nothing was working for me. I got home, tried to cuddle the cat (she was having NONE of it), and then sat on the bed.
At that point, the bed frame came apart. Apparently there were a couple of screws loose, but still.
I lost it.
It's a good thing that crying can help relieve stress and can wash out hormones from the system, because I needed to have that meltdown. Once I was finished with my little tantrum, I was able to spend some time thinking about the day, the next couple of days, and to find my center again. (It was missing most of the day.)
I had a bad day yesterday. It happens.
I am hoping that the clients for this day will be easy to engage in music therapy, will be ready for whatever challenges we have, and will be patient with me as I continue to work for them and with them. Things will be fine.
Bad days. Without them, how would we know when we are having good days?
It started with my blog post about the Wednesday group that I always dread. Writing about it was a bit cathartic - it allowed me to spend some time thinking through my various strategies. I toddled off to work with good expectations for the day.
I should have known that something was up when I pulled into the gas station. The prices at my gas station are less than the gas stations in the town I work, so I always try to fill up at home. The station is a little bit out of my way, but not so much that it doesn't make sense to get gasoline there. I pulled into the station and took note of the price - $2.66 per gallon (I know that there are some folks out there thinking that is expensive and many more who are thinking, "$2.66 a gallon? Where is that? That's a GREAT price!!"). I started the transaction. As I chose my gasoline, I noticed the price on the pump was $2.97. I double-checked the price on the sign, then looked at the pump again. I cancelled the transaction and then went to another pump. Same thing. I think I ruined the day of the person who was working there, but she needed to know that there was a difference (it's illegal to advertise one price and charge another). I left and went to another station about 20 miles away from my home. I paid a little bit more, but not 30 cents more a gallon!
I am doing bus duty solo this week. Bus duty is one of those "other duties as assigned" that happens when you don't have a classroom full of children at 8:00am. During the school year, we have 5 people who do bus duty. During summer school, we have 2 of us. My bus duty partner is currently on vacation, so, this week, there is me. 37 kids, 20 buses, 20 minutes, and me. To add to my stresses (real and imagined), my badge only works occasionally - I think it thinks that I've accessed the building too much and then wants to keep me out of the building for my own safety...or sanity...I'm not sure which! So, I am standing outside the building with four students (approximately half of whom, during this particular trip, did not want to go to school) calling on the walkie talkie for someone to open the door and let us in. (If I can wait 5 minutes, I can get back in by myself, but I cannot have my students waiting for 5 minutes while the technology catches up.) Of course, no one is actually listening to the walkie talkies, so I am standing there pounding on the door trying to keep kids calm, interested in walking into the building, and trying to stay positive through all of this.
Then came sessions. I can't even start to talk about that. I'm thinking that the building heat and humidity is creeping into our ways of relating to each other in not-so-good ways. Kids screamed, kids tried to break things, kids required assistance to be safe. It was exhausting.
I had to finish my therapy day sitting in a meeting. If you know anything about me, you should know that meetings are not my favorite things to do. Even the meetings I chair are not just "sit there and listen" type meetings. There are things to do, tasks, and treats! There were none of those things during this meeting.
I left right after the meeting. Nothing on the iPod fit my mood. I spent lots of time trying to find something to assist me in mood vectoring, but nothing was working for me. I got home, tried to cuddle the cat (she was having NONE of it), and then sat on the bed.
At that point, the bed frame came apart. Apparently there were a couple of screws loose, but still.
I lost it.
It's a good thing that crying can help relieve stress and can wash out hormones from the system, because I needed to have that meltdown. Once I was finished with my little tantrum, I was able to spend some time thinking about the day, the next couple of days, and to find my center again. (It was missing most of the day.)
I had a bad day yesterday. It happens.
I am hoping that the clients for this day will be easy to engage in music therapy, will be ready for whatever challenges we have, and will be patient with me as I continue to work for them and with them. Things will be fine.
Bad days. Without them, how would we know when we are having good days?
Comments
Post a Comment