Wallowing in Self-Pity

My morning started very early and with horrible acid reflux that did not respond to my typical treatments. This seems to be more of the symptoms from the stomach/intestinal bug that swept through my facility all winter. I'm checking with my friend who had this not once, but twice this year, to see if my symptoms are the same as hers. If so, it will be a bit of a relief to know where this particular bug came from.

I debated long and hard with myself today about taking the sick day or going into work. I haven't been to work for a long time since this illness has coincided with my Spring Break and has extended that time. I was looking forward to getting back to work and getting into my routine. I miss my clients and my co-workers. I miss the opportunity to be engaged in music therapy and am increasingly frustrated with the fact that I can't seem to spend more than 2 minutes without having to belch - singing is DEFINITELY out of the question! My middle schoolers would love to hear me burp all the time, but I doubt that we would get much music therapy done in between the hysterical laughter because an adult couldn't control her bodily functions!

The debate ended at about 4:50 am when I couldn't seem to conquer the current round of stomach upset. No reason to get out and go somewhere if I will only end up driving back after contaminating my students and my co-workers. That won't end the germ cycle.

Today will be another day of trying to figure out how to get better, attempting to use the remedies available to me, and feeling bad about being here. I'll try to catch up on the 5 hours of lost sleep (due to reflux) and try to get better.

Why is self-care so difficult?

I am wallowing in self-pity right now.

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