Dear AMTA

Thoughts and Musings...

After a two day forced hiatus from blogging (Thanks, blogger!), I have several thoughts about things. Forgive me as I indulge in some random thoughts and musings about music, therapy, and me. Probably mostly me. Sorry.

I have been on vacation for the past nine days. I have ten days to go. While I feel that vacations are essential for the health and well-being of every therapist, I find it difficult to be away from the music therapy world for long periods of time. I always make a list of things that I want to do, and I never get those things done. This vacation's goal is to steam clean the carpet in my bedroom. I am almost to the point of being able to move furniture to clean the first half. I had to do the great laundry mountain first.

A friend of my family died this week very unexpectedly. This has hit my father hard as this friend was one of his best friends. He was shocked and deeply grieving. He was not able to talk to me for long periods of time when he found out because he was upset. My father is not ashamed to cry - he cries whenever he is proud of his children, he cries when movies turn sad, and he cries when his friends die. I have been grieving this friend from 1500 miles away. Dad has worked through his initial shock and is able to talk about George now. I grieve for both George's family and for mine as we go through the grief process.

I am an introvert - a STRONG introvert. I need time away from people, but I also need to around people. I heard an interesting definition of introversion - an introvert enjoys being around people but refreshes his/her enthusiasm and energy away from big groups of people. I have had enough time on my own and now I need to be around people. I do not have to interact with those people, but I do need to be around people. So, I am heading to the big outlet mall to see a movie (I have a coupon ;-).

Silence is something else that I crave at times.

I do not think that I am alone in my craving for silence. Many of the music therapists that I know look for some silence in their days. I do not listen to music outside my therapy clinic. I am more likely to make music rather than to listen to the performances of others when I am outside my clinic. I listen to NPR talk radio on my commutes from home to work with the occasional foray into prepared playlists. I use the iso-principle every chance I can get - I change music to fit my mood, often going through an entire CD not finding what I want to find. I make Favorites CDs - for my own personal use - of music that intrigues me at the moment of creation. These CDs often gain the criticism of others who find the abrupt changes of music jarring. I will often change from Fanfare for the Common Man to U2 to The Shirelles to music from Star Wars. I choose the music because I like it. There is no rhyme or reason to my choices, except for the reason in my own head. I do not make my choices for the comfort of others, but for myself. 

Therapy for the therapist. Time for a new Favorites CD.