This week, we received word that one of our clients had passed away. For some music therapists, this is a more common occurrence, but for us, it is a rare occasion. This young man had severe multiple disabilities and had stopped breathing several times in his short life. He had always responded to resucitation in the past, but this time the episode was undetected. We heard on Monday morning at the beginning of the school day.
I was bringing another student into the classroom from the bus. The support service staff get kids off the buses in the morning and take them to class. I walked into the class with the student to find all three of the staff hysterically sobbing. They had just found out about his death. The students, all of whom have multiple disabilities, were just sitting where they were, waiting for staff members to come and interact with them.
I helped out, getting kids ready for breakfast, fielding questions from others about why staff members were crying and wailing, and giving them some time to compose themselves. I then left the room to tell the interns about our client.
My role during the week was that of listener. I heard stories about our kid, I listened to the teacher as she went through some of the mourning process, and I listened to the students as they conveyed their grief in different ways.
On Friday, the day after the funeral, I woke early to find myself staring outside at the strange sky. It caught my attention enough that I opened my front blinds - a rare event. I looked outside and saw a huge rainbow. The pictures here do not do it justice. I found myself crying and grieving for the little boy who would not be returning to school. I had time to be the mourner rather than the therapist. I cried for his family, left behind, for the pain that he went through, and for the staff members who loved him. I watched the rainbow until it faded from sight.
I find that my faith helps me greatly when faced with grief. I firmly believe that the rainbow lit my boy's path to heaven where he is now playing and laughing. I am looking forward to meeting him again someday.
Now, I am able to act like the therapist that I am for others who have not found their rainbows.
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