Beck to the Routine of Work and Not Work

Let me start off this post by saying that the non-profit organization that I work with has a new CEO.

Recently, this CEO - a person who has worked for the organization for about 5 or 7 years now (I don't really know) in two different positions - sent out an inspirational email about how we should be giving our work 150% at all times. The CEO stated that she does this, and all the rest of us should do this as well.

I have to tell you that this really rubbed a hole in my brain and is something that I have been thinking about over the past week while I was resting at home away from work. I no longer feel that work deserves 150% of my energy, or my thinking, or my time. I just don't think that work needs this type of dedication. I have struggled with having work boundaries in the past and getting this expectation sent to my inbox just stirred up all the guilt, all the thoughts, and all the goblins of the past.

So, this past week has been full of thinking. That's the best thing about having some time off where I do not have to go anywhere or see anyone - I can just think. It is also one of the worst things about having some time off where I do not have to go anywhere or see anyone - I have little to no distractions that shift my attention. 

There is nothing to be gained from giving my work 150% of my energy. 

Absolutely nothing.

As we are being asked to give more than our all to our work, the facility is also recognizing that our jobs are not easy ones. They are starting a workforce support team that includes a counselor (who I would NEVER go see because the person hired makes me feel VERY uncomfortable) and several support staff. So, at least there is some recognition that working with our clients is not an easy job. I wonder what is going to happen when this new program is up and running and either is overwhelmed by staff members or is not used at all. How can a counselor in the employ of an agency be trusted to keep confidential information about workers from the agency policymakers? I just wonder how this is going to work.

Can you see what's been happening in my brain lately?

Today is our first day back to work after our holiday break. I am not really happy about having to be up and out of my bed, but I am doing it. I am looking forward to seeing my students and getting back into my work/home routines.

I do not give my work all of my attention, focus, energy. I strive for a good balance between work and not work. That is especially crucial during this time of the year. 

Since I no longer work at a church job, I don't have to go through the Blue Christmas service, the caroling, the Christmas Eve service, the Advent routines. I kind of miss that routine, but I am also enjoying two days off from work every weekend. This will be the first winter break where I will be home before Christmas Eve in 26 years! I will get to relax and enjoy the holiday rather than be a leader of others' experience of the Christmas story. I have an opportunity to be rested rather than overworked and exhausted!

When I am working with my clients, they get as much of my attention as I can give them. When I am away from our sessions, then I get that attention back. I do not feel that my job is something that has to take over my entire existence, and that is why I will not be giving 150% of my life over to my job.

My not work hours as just as important to me as my work hours are to my facility. I pledge to keep myself ready and able to do my job, but I am not going to be available 24/7. This job does not pay enough for that kind of access to me - and there is rarely a music therapy emergency that requires me to work outside of my contract hours. The agency is not willing to pay me for additional hours outside of my contracted time, so I am not willing to provide those hours for free.

It is time to go upstairs, get my water bottle ready, gather things for lunch, and head out into the sub-freezing temperatures to get to work. We will be doing our Country of the Month this week, so I have a pretty easy session strategy. Next week is our Holiday Sing, so that will be the end of my holiday obligations for the month. In three weeks, I will be on Winter Break, so it is going to be an attitude of "one day at a time" for the next 21 days.

Time to get back into my work and not work routine.

Happy Monday??

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