Wednesday and the Woeful Countenance

woman with a pout on her mouth, staring directly into the camera.
Does anyone out there besides me know the music of Man of La Mancha? I only ask because there is a song going through my head right now. (It's below, by the way!) I'm not sure why this song is sticking except that I am having to paste such a countenance on my face quite often these days.

I am tired of having to wear such a countenance. I really am, but it is somewhat difficult to find other expressions to wear these days. So, add my voice to those of the world who are tired of the restrictions that we have to bear these days.

I am tired of it all, but I will still abide by it all.

Perhaps that is what being an adult is all about - not liking something, but realizing that it is important, so doing it anyway.

I am identifying with this song a bit more than usual.


It interests me that the song is meant to be a celebration of the deeds of this woeful person. It offers this sad man some recognition of what he has had to do and he seems to be uplifted by that same recognition. Is that what I am seeking? - probably a bit, but I'm not sure that recognition is what I need at this moment. I think I need a good purge of emotion - a crying fit or a temper tantrum with the ability to smash stuff or throw things in a way not befitting my maturity level AT ALL!

I am allowing the actions of others to affect my way of being, and that is not the healthiest place for me to be. I am internalizing the reactions of clients and owning them when they are not my own and have little to nothing to do with me. I am making things personal that are not entirely so.

It is time to break out my mantra-prayer and start using it again. I have one, but I'm not going to share it here. I encourage you to find your own mantra or prayer or way to focus your thoughts and energies into your work.

I am staring to feel better. It is time to put on my uniform and head to the world of angry clients who are angry because they are wired to be angry. I am going to do my best to do what I can do...even with my woeful countenance.

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