Thoughtful Thursday: Taking a Step Back Into a New Future

I am celebrating my life changes right now - giving up things that I no longer want to do and finding new things to help me fill some time. This process is not one that I was anticipating in this year, but I have learned to go with the flow of life rather than fight against it too much. Well, I still fight it as evidenced by my constant nattering about things in the music therapy world, but you know - I am getting better.

There are so many things to feel grateful for in this point of my life, but there are also so many things to mourn. I am trying to do both at the same time while continuing my journey as a music therapist. I am enjoying the concept of changing my work schedule to work only my contract hours rather than internship hours. I like knowing that I will be able to leave my workplace at 3:15 every day. This means some more time at home each day which is taking some getting used to, but is nice. I like having more afternoon time. Right now, I want to fill up that time with something productive and good for me, but I am not doing much yet. I also now have two weekend days during the school year - something that I have not had since 1998. I am trying to get used to that fact as well.

I started a new journal this week. Seems like a good time to do some reflection about my recent past and looking into the near and far off future.

I am going to have an exhibition table at the Midwestern region conference next spring. (The last time I tried to do this, the world shut down, so I am hoping that I can make this a reality this time around - DO YOU HEAR ME, WORLD OF GERMS AND VIRUSES????) This means that I need to have products ready. So, some of my afternoon times can be used to create products for music therapists. I will break out the old notes on what I wanted for my exhibit table and update the ideas.

I want to make more things for my Etsy and TPT shops. While I do not make much money from either of these shops, I enjoy offering items for others to use. I was sitting in my office a while ago, making tasks for my students to use to work on academic concepts, and I realized that I love making those things. I love creating activities and visual aids for music therapy clients to use in their treatment. I like making the actual file folders and pieces as well as designing things, so why not continue? I also like making non-music therapy things as well, so it is time to create!

I am not someone who likes being bored. I have always had lots to do, but lately, my output has been less than I want it to be. It is time to get back into the swing of making things. Now that we are entering the autumn/winter time of year around here, I tend to have a bit more energy and interest in all of these things, so let's get going!

My brain is what gets in my way with this type of goal-setting and achievement.

When I get home, my brain is tired. I think getting into a creation routine might help with waking myself up. Right now, I have some file folders for my own music therapy clinic waiting to be laminated. I will finish them tonight. They need to be laminated and then velcroed (I like that as a verb) to be done. That's it, yet they have been sitting on my floor since the beginning of August. Time to try a new evening routine, I guess.

The problem with having ideal routines is that there are things that I need to do in addition to just doing the routine. I know what I want, but it takes work to get there. There are times when I just don't want to do the work - I am lazy with my off-work hours. I want to change that now that have more off-work hours. I wish I could flip my ponytail and have everything fly into place.

Next week, I am going to an organ concert with a friend from work. It is something happening on a Tuesday night - unheard of for me! Next Wednesday will be difficult to get going, but the live music event should help with that. I may include something outside of my house every week as well. We will see. Right now, I am secure in the knowledge that I am moving into a season that is good for me. 

I am resisting the urge to leave my house right now because I am feeling my time anxiety. The reality is that the only person who cares when I arrive at work is me. The others are more concerned about when I leave. So, I want to be true to my contract hours and leave when I am supposed to leave in the morning and in the afternoon.

Thanks for reading my nattering. I really do appreciate it!

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