Tired Thursday: The Aftermath of a Long Day

Yesterday was the first of four 12-hour days that we have on our school calendar this year.

Just from the start of this post, I want you to know that I HATE 12-hour days at my job with a passion. They always mess with my routine and make me feel sick afterwards. Today is no exception.

Last evening was Back to School Night. No one came to my room (that I know of - we had a LONG meeting yesterday, so there may have been someone who came by, but I wasn't there). In the 29 Back to School Nights that I have been at the facility, I might have had a dozen visitors in total. We have done special things before and now we are in an era of just be in your room (or in a meeting) and see if anyone stops by. Different administrators have demanded different things from us.

The second of our 12-hour days will be a day off for me - I get to prepare for a medical procedure happening the next day. That is a conference day, and I do not usually participate in those days.

My problem with 12-hour days is that it messes up my evening medication routine which has implications for the next morning. As I am writing this, I have had little sleep, my head is foggy, and my medication side effects have not abated, so I am here later than usual and will arrive at work late. I am struggling with the idea of going to work, but I know that I need to go there. Work will be fine once I arrive, but the act of going seems difficult right now. Walking up the stairs, getting dressed, driving. It all just seems too much, but I will do it because I want to have some sick time at the end of this year.

I wish we did not have to do 12-hour days, but my administrators insist on them. At least we only have four this year - one year, we had 10 12-hour days. It was exhausting to have to work a day and a half that many times. It is still exhausting to work four days per year on this schedule, but it is SO much better than ten days. I have to remind myself of that fact as I am trying to get up and get going.

I wish I had ambition or any kind of ability to motivate myself to do something, but I don't at the moment. I wanted to work in my storage closet last night, but once there, I was overwhelmed by the job and just shut down. That is not who I want to be, and it is not how I want to present myself to others. 

I have a long prep day tomorrow, and I am going to work on that storage room. I want it to be functional for me and for my clients as well. I will have to focus on one small part of the room at a time. One folder. One corner. One shelf. I will try to find some energy and some motivation in the exhaustion. At least the mandatory attendance at the high school's pep rally was cancelled due to high temperatures and heat advisories in our area. That decision made my life easier.

My brain is clearing, so I am going to head out into the world. I am going to get breakfast, and I am going to do my job.

It is time. Happy Tired Thursday!