Vintage Music Therapy Perspectives: An Occasional Series

It has been several days since I have posted. I wrote a post yesterday, but it wasn't what I like to put out into the world, so it will forever remain a draft. I have lots of posts like that - ideas that are just too private or are just too confused to share with others. So, I write, but I don't always publish my paragraphs.

There is a bit of wisdom in remembering that things do not have to be shared with the general public.

Several months ago, a classmate of mine and I decided that we needed to be referred to as "Vintage music therapists." You know the ones - the ones that are experienced but not old enough to retire yet. The ones that started their careers in the 20th century but have transitioned into being 21st century therapists because they had no other choice. The therapists who started their careers in the CD age and now work with streaming services (but don't fully trust those streaming services because of previous instances where the wi-fi wasn't strong enough to sustain streaming).

We have been innovators. We have been the "young ones" that didn't have the historical perspective that our elders had. We are now the music therapists who have been through so much that we have gained that historical perspective and strive to use it to sustain things that are important elements of being music therapists in the workplace as it stands at this time, in these places.

I have reached a time in my life and my career where I am constantly evaluating where my priorities lie in the world of music therapy.

These priorities have changed significantly in the past six years.

More discussion about this leads me into ranting behavior and complaining. That is not my favorite state of being, so I have deleted so much writing this morning.

I don't think this feeling is imposter syndrome. This time around, I feel like I have experienced everything that I can. I feel more like I have outlived the usefulness of my professional interactions and organizations. I also feel I've been used up by the same organizations and professionals. I am not sure of my ideas or value in this profession these days.

This is a phase, and I know it is a phase, so I am not worried about this feeling, but I am sad about it as well. It is not a comforting feeling to feel like you no longer have a place in a world you've inhabited for a very long time, but these feelings will also pass.

I have been thinking lots about retirement these days - mainly because I will be able to retire from my current full-time job in a little bit over 2 1/2 years from now with a full pension payment. I will not be able to stop working, but I will be able to stop working where I am now. I am trying to figure out what I will do when I change into the next iteration of my work life. I would like to continue to work as a music therapist, but I want to be a bit more picky about what I do in my next life. I do not want to have to take every single thing that comes across my gaze, but I want to be able to sustain myself and my selected clients. I want to give ideas to music therapists. I want to cultivate and sustain communities of music therapists to share information and ideas. I want to be part of organizations that promote music therapy best practices for the benefit of clients - NOT for the benefit of music therapists! I want to write about being a clinician. I want to hear from others about their lives as clinicians. My future dreams are coming into focus for me, and I am hoping that that focus will sharpen.

For now, though, I am going to give some keys to a former co-worker who left them in the town where I work but lives in the town where I live. After that, I have two doctor's appointments - eye and worker's compensation. I will probably do some shopping as well. I don't need anything, but I have to spend my time between appointments somehow. I would love to find a bookstore and go in to spend some money, but I'm not sure where one is in the area I will be around. I guess I will go figure that out now...

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