Being Tired, and Then Finding Something To Help With That Feeling...Our Future!

I am tired.

This seems to be my usual state of being these days, and my level of interest in the world outside my small series of interactions has diminished greatly in the past weeks. I am tired physically and emotionally and psychologically and pretty much all the time. I have been looking forward to this day for the simple reason that the political propaganda should stop arriving in my inbox and be present on my entertainment sources. (Now, I am saying this in the midst of my up swing, so when I am on my down swing, I find this even more devastating than I do at this very moment.)

I live in a perpetual state of exhaustion, but I look forward to talking to a select group of people out there - music therapy interns.

I spend most of my Tuesday evenings talking to current interns. I have run a series of webinars for many years now - all free for music therapy interns, and all about music therapy. I have a chance to share information that is not often addressed in coursework - developing systems and organization structures to get work done. We talk about self-care and about writing music. We discuss things that I think are important to the act of being a music therapist. 

This last bunch of interns has been more interactive than groups in the past, and I am finding that very satisfying on my end. I like hearing what interns think and want from our profession. I enjoy hearing perspectives different from my own and find it important to listen to what current interns struggle to do in this time and age.

My own interns are inspiring every single day. I love watching them develop ideas and strategies that are so far out of what I would ever develop on my own! I love taking them from where they are and making a suggestion that strengthens their interactions ever so slightly. I love being a mentor to the next generation of music therapists.

I have always maintained that I learn more from my interns than they learn from me, and I continue to feel that way. I have learned how to teach diverse learners and to support them in their path into music therapy. I learn lots of new music, many different ideas and perspectives about music therapy, and I learn lots about myself when I get stuck in the role that I am in now - that of observer.

I am currently watching my interns do my job.

I am having to stifle my responses to clients to favor my interns and give them a chance to respond and redirect the way that they will do it - possibly not my way, but that doesn't mean that their way is the wrong way. I find this stage of intern development the most challenging for me. I want to be the one who is facilitating things for my clients, but I know that my role has to change in order to help the interns grow into strong music therapists. So, I suffer in, well, certainly NOT silence, but in the knowledge that, just like with my clients, it is my job to put myself out of a job!

Knowing that makes going out into the uncertain world that is present at this time and place just a bit easier.