Life is Too Short

A music therapist who is also an acquaintance of mine was talking about doing nothing for an entire day. He made the observation that it was difficult for him to plan a day of nothing - no work on presentations, no catching up on progress notes, nothing at all planned...a complete day devoted to self-care and something just for him.

 I can certainly relate.

 I think many music therapists can relate to his conundrum. How do you get away from the job, enjoy getting away, and find something to refresh you enough to get back to the job?

 For me, my issue usually comes in the form of guilt - guilt that I'm letting someone down (I'm usually not), guilt that work will still be waiting (because it always is waiting - it's work), and guilt that doing something just for me is inherently selfish. I'm learning to let those feelings of guilt start, pass through my conscious mind, and then leave me again.

I am part of a Facebook group for music therapy business owners. I enjoy reading the posts of those who are successful business owners, and I am often in awe of those clinicians who have enough business savvy to fight for contracts, schedule clients, and strive to provide services to clients all over the world. My own idea of a business is significantly different than theirs. I learn so much about business and self-care from those clinicians.

Every so often, a post comes up about some of the feelings I described earlier. Feelings of guilt due to the need to shift client sessions around or taking a day off for illness or having to cancel a client for any type of reason abound. It is oddly reassuring to know that others share many of my feelings when it comes to self-care and guilt.

Over the 23+years that I've been a professional in this vocation, I have learned that life is too short to be miserable.

This has been my mantra for years and years, through many jobs, and in many different places. When I start to feel down, I start to examine my options and increase the self-care focus. It is time for that type of introspection for me.

How will I do this? I'll schedule some time into my life for things I love - a guilt-free time just for me. I've already scheduled in some ice cream time (once I get a task done!) this weekend. I am going to revel in the fact that I don't have to attend Back to School Night tonight since I already have a Wednesday evening job. I am going to make a lunch to eat today to help me have energy for my afternoon groups.

The last thing that I am going to do for self-care is enjoy the fact that I will be going to work late tomorrow. I have an appointment for my knee that doesn't happen until 8:45 am, so I am taking a late morning. I don't know when I will post tomorrow morning, so don't be alarmed if I am later than usual. The novelty of a later morning start is something that I am going to relish.

For the rest of you music therapists out there, take time for you. Here are some thoughts for you as you think about your own self-care:

  • Schedule self-care as a matter of course.
  • Realize that self-care is at least as important as any client that you serve.
  • Make self-care time dedicated to only care of self.
  • Don't let guilt take away your focus on self.
  • If you are unhappy somewhere, change your circumstances.
  • Life is too short to be miserable. Find your bliss.

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