Favorite Things Friday - Caring for Others
Yesterday was a day of travel for me. I started off the day in the airport near my parents' house and ended it at my home. In between, there were flight cancellations, significant flight delays, missed flights, rebooked flights, significant attitudes displayed, and FINALLY, a way home.
I like to think of myself as someone who cares for others. (This may not be evident by this blog, which does tend to focus on ME, but that's in the title - and, everyone is entitled to a little selfishness every once in a while.) I honestly try to place the needs of others before my own, but this trait has a way of making me a doormat when other people want their ways.
This was demonstrated over and over again in the airports yesterday.
People were making demands. They were cutting in lines. They were yelling at ticket agents - who were not the ones making the decisions. People kept insisting that their situations were more dire than the situations of each and every other person on each flight. Somewhat like, "Well, I can see that you are trying to get to the hospital for a transplant, but my daughter has to drive 20 minutes to the airport to pick me up, so I need preferential treatment." "Well, I missed my flight, so I need to push in front of the 20 people who are waiting patiently to be served, who, by the way, also missed their flights."
I always apologize to the gate agents who have to put up with cranky passengers and who attempt to soothe emotions and feelings that are not something they caused. I thank them for their patience and for listening to me when it's my turn.
Is that part of being a good therapist? I think it is. I think there is an inherent need, not only to assist others, but to be respectful of the feelings of those we establish relationships with on either a long or short term basis. I hope some of those ticket agents and gate agents remember that they were thanked for their job performance and attitude during the very long day - in between the selfish, cranky, and downright stupid interactions that they had as well.
I believe that compassion is inherent, but must be practiced in order for it to work and continue to be a skill. I have countless stories about people who are considered "disabled" who are much more caring and compassionate about the feelings of others than anyone who is NDA (not diagnosed yet). Without practice, this skill withers until you are left with an attitude of "It's all about me and heck with anyone else. I DESERVE whatever I want whenever I want it!"
That's just not right.
So, today, on this second day of 2015, take some time to practice caring for someone outside of your regular routine. Thank someone who does something for you on a regular basis, but who doesn't get much attention for doing their job well. Thank a client who makes an effort to make music therapy enjoyable for all people involved. Thank a co-worker for something that he or she does well. Look, for just a moment, for situations where caring is happening and acknowledge it!
I'm off to work. I wonder who I'll see actively caring.
I like to think of myself as someone who cares for others. (This may not be evident by this blog, which does tend to focus on ME, but that's in the title - and, everyone is entitled to a little selfishness every once in a while.) I honestly try to place the needs of others before my own, but this trait has a way of making me a doormat when other people want their ways.
This was demonstrated over and over again in the airports yesterday.
People were making demands. They were cutting in lines. They were yelling at ticket agents - who were not the ones making the decisions. People kept insisting that their situations were more dire than the situations of each and every other person on each flight. Somewhat like, "Well, I can see that you are trying to get to the hospital for a transplant, but my daughter has to drive 20 minutes to the airport to pick me up, so I need preferential treatment." "Well, I missed my flight, so I need to push in front of the 20 people who are waiting patiently to be served, who, by the way, also missed their flights."
I always apologize to the gate agents who have to put up with cranky passengers and who attempt to soothe emotions and feelings that are not something they caused. I thank them for their patience and for listening to me when it's my turn.
Is that part of being a good therapist? I think it is. I think there is an inherent need, not only to assist others, but to be respectful of the feelings of those we establish relationships with on either a long or short term basis. I hope some of those ticket agents and gate agents remember that they were thanked for their job performance and attitude during the very long day - in between the selfish, cranky, and downright stupid interactions that they had as well.
I believe that compassion is inherent, but must be practiced in order for it to work and continue to be a skill. I have countless stories about people who are considered "disabled" who are much more caring and compassionate about the feelings of others than anyone who is NDA (not diagnosed yet). Without practice, this skill withers until you are left with an attitude of "It's all about me and heck with anyone else. I DESERVE whatever I want whenever I want it!"
That's just not right.
So, today, on this second day of 2015, take some time to practice caring for someone outside of your regular routine. Thank someone who does something for you on a regular basis, but who doesn't get much attention for doing their job well. Thank a client who makes an effort to make music therapy enjoyable for all people involved. Thank a co-worker for something that he or she does well. Look, for just a moment, for situations where caring is happening and acknowledge it!
I'm off to work. I wonder who I'll see actively caring.
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