I Just Don't Want to Go

Oh, dear.

Today is one of those days where I just don't want to go to work. We are experiencing lots of unannounced changes where kids are "visiting" new classrooms to become accustomed to places that they will be going soon that directly affect music therapy. We have students assigned where there are spaces rather than where things make sense for group treatment, and I don't want to go. I like my paycheck, though, so I am going to work today. My intern has influenza, so I am the only option for music therapy this week. My flu shot has protected me so far, so I am not flu-ish, just tired and crabby. Wednesdays are my busiest group day as well, so there is lots to do. I also missed one of their sessions during my continuing education week, so I feel like I have to be around this week.

One of the things that happens in a psychiatric residential treatment facility's school is that we have to be very flexible with how we provide educational enrichment services. We have kids on our waiting list who require pervasive supports across their days, so we have to make some room for them in specific classrooms. This means that kids that we know will move to different places. making all of our classrooms different. This means a general feeling of uneasiness as every classroom structure and hierarchy is changing.

In times like this, "specials" teachers and therapists (like me) are often the ones providing client-specific training to people who do not know the students as well as we do. I have to tell the Behavioral Health Technicians (BHTs) that this client does not use a chair because the client enjoys standing on it and jumping off while screeching at a very high volume. I am the one who models how this particular student communicates wants and needs because I am the one in the group who has known this student since age 11.

The problem with this type of season is that there is no consistency in how groups respond to music therapy treatment. All of the old assumptions go out the window when a "guest" shows up in a music therapy group. Have some plans that include academic work? Introduce a client who does not recognize letters?? Plans have to change immediately.

One thing my job does not do well is let those of us on the periphery know that students are moving around internally. So, having new students in a couple of my groups yesterday was a surprise. This is one of the reasons that session plans are often irrelevant in my job - I can certainly plan whatever, but then a student with different educational and clinical goals walks into the session. Nothing planned will work! So, I have to scramble at the last moment to accommodate the needs of the "guest" while still accommodating the needs of the clients who are "regulars."

Can you tell that I am tired and don't want to go??

Instead of dreading this situation, I am going to try to reframe my way of thinking. Changes to the class list are challenges that are part of my continued interest in this job. To be honest, though, it would be nice not to have all the challenges at the same time. I am going to develop strategies that will help me acclimatize the "guests" into their new classrooms and the routines that happen in music therapy with those classrooms. My responses to groups have to change to accommodate the needs of all clients in the area. 

I just wish that I knew who was coming before they entered my room.

Honestly, I also wish that I had a voice about where each person would best fit. We're putting kids who scream constantly in classrooms with kids who have hyperacuity. It does not make much sense to me. We're doing that simply because there are less students in the classroom than others. It is something of convenience for us, the adults. Smaller class sizes means more ability to work with students with significant behaviors of concern, but it doesn't necessarily mean that the class members are a good match for one another.

Okay - think of this as a challenge and a puzzle to solve. Remember that my philosophical basis is humanism and match my treatment goals and session strategies to the clients that are in front of me - no matter who it is. Be prepared to pivot. Don't make any plans. Don't even really get out materials because there are students who cannot use specific materials. If they see those instruments or props or visuals, they will engage in behaviors of concern. So, I have to rely on my creativity, knowledge of music, therapy, and of my clients as well as on my experiences of this exact situation. I have survived this before, and I will survive this again. 

In the meantime, I am going to take myself to breakfast and then dinner because that's what I do to help my stress levels - I eat.