It's Been Six Days Now...
...since I started my vacation and since I've been in my music therapy clinical space. My house is starting to be a bit cleaner (still have LOTS to go until it's somewhat clean), and I'm finding my way into a vacation state of mind.
The importance of self-care rings true to me, especially in vacation times. I need the time to be by myself, to be quiet, and to be away from the responsibilities of being a caregiver. It is important to do so, and I am grateful for the opportunity to have time off from my job. The other side of things is important for me as well.
I need time to get bored with my own company. I have a need to feel like there is more I want to do with my clients and with other people. As an introvert (who is told she's really good at masking her introversion in social settings), I have a need to be away from others to refresh and renew my energy. I need to spend time in the company of my cat and only my cat in order to restore my desire to be around other people. Vacation does that for me. I'm not quite to the point of craving my job, but it will happen. Check back in about a week...
Back to the concept of self-care. In my case, the most effective self-care is to be in my own company for a length of time. I am going out into the world every day - to shop, to go to my church job, yesterday I went to a movie - but I am spending most of the time in my space, gaining some control over what has lapsed since I have been feeling overwhelmed, too busy, and sick. It is important to me that I gain control. Until I have the feeling that I have conquered the mess, I will not start to get bored. I will be quiet. I will spend time staring at the cat. I will try to accomplish one cleaning/clearing task today. I'm thinking the file cabinets will be the place to start today.
When I talk to others about self-care, I try to stress the importance of finding something that is meaningful. I cannot offer self-care prescriptions to others - I can only find my own way. It is amazing how the people I talk to most often do not have a self-care plan. They do not know how to refresh their compassion and ability to care for others. I wonder if this is why our profession is so young. Are we sending entry-level therapists into the world without an idea of how to replenish their care levels? Does their caring well run dry? Is that why they leave the profession? I know I had to find my own way into self-care. I didn't learn much about self-care as a new therapist, either. I had to figure it out. Fortunately, we did talk about being caregivers and we spoke lots about burnout, so I had some tools at my fingertips to help me with the transition into the role of caregiver. Others do not seem to have those same tools.
Where would self-care go into a curriculum? We really don't have a place where self-care fits naturally. Would it be appropriate to talk about it during pre-internship clinical experiences? Better during senior year music therapy theory courses? Better during the first year of entry-level experience? Should it be something that is enfolded into the curriculum from the first day of music therapy education? So many questions.
Can you tell that I've had some time to myself?
As I go through this journey of self-care, discovery, and refreshment, I may have moments when I am ready to go to work. I may have moments when I don't want to ever work again. These are typical of my process but still manage to surprise me each time.
Today? File cabinets, church, and watching Sherlock on my Roku box. Tomorrow? Who knows?
The importance of self-care rings true to me, especially in vacation times. I need the time to be by myself, to be quiet, and to be away from the responsibilities of being a caregiver. It is important to do so, and I am grateful for the opportunity to have time off from my job. The other side of things is important for me as well.
I need time to get bored with my own company. I have a need to feel like there is more I want to do with my clients and with other people. As an introvert (who is told she's really good at masking her introversion in social settings), I have a need to be away from others to refresh and renew my energy. I need to spend time in the company of my cat and only my cat in order to restore my desire to be around other people. Vacation does that for me. I'm not quite to the point of craving my job, but it will happen. Check back in about a week...
Back to the concept of self-care. In my case, the most effective self-care is to be in my own company for a length of time. I am going out into the world every day - to shop, to go to my church job, yesterday I went to a movie - but I am spending most of the time in my space, gaining some control over what has lapsed since I have been feeling overwhelmed, too busy, and sick. It is important to me that I gain control. Until I have the feeling that I have conquered the mess, I will not start to get bored. I will be quiet. I will spend time staring at the cat. I will try to accomplish one cleaning/clearing task today. I'm thinking the file cabinets will be the place to start today.
When I talk to others about self-care, I try to stress the importance of finding something that is meaningful. I cannot offer self-care prescriptions to others - I can only find my own way. It is amazing how the people I talk to most often do not have a self-care plan. They do not know how to refresh their compassion and ability to care for others. I wonder if this is why our profession is so young. Are we sending entry-level therapists into the world without an idea of how to replenish their care levels? Does their caring well run dry? Is that why they leave the profession? I know I had to find my own way into self-care. I didn't learn much about self-care as a new therapist, either. I had to figure it out. Fortunately, we did talk about being caregivers and we spoke lots about burnout, so I had some tools at my fingertips to help me with the transition into the role of caregiver. Others do not seem to have those same tools.
Where would self-care go into a curriculum? We really don't have a place where self-care fits naturally. Would it be appropriate to talk about it during pre-internship clinical experiences? Better during senior year music therapy theory courses? Better during the first year of entry-level experience? Should it be something that is enfolded into the curriculum from the first day of music therapy education? So many questions.
Can you tell that I've had some time to myself?
As I go through this journey of self-care, discovery, and refreshment, I may have moments when I am ready to go to work. I may have moments when I don't want to ever work again. These are typical of my process but still manage to surprise me each time.
Today? File cabinets, church, and watching Sherlock on my Roku box. Tomorrow? Who knows?
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