Thoughtful Thursday: Too Many Feels

I am currently full of diverse and challenging emotions - some are my own and others seem to have arrived from other people. I am trying really hard to figure out what to attend to and what to express and what to ignore and what to stuff and what to experience. It is not easy when emotions start to take over.

I have written many different posts about my rational mind and my emotional mind. I seem to be on the brink of an emotional mind takeover, and I am trying to get my rational mind interested in stepping up and remaining in charge of my interactions with the world. It is not easy for me, but my usual systems are made for this type of time, and they help me remain on track.

 Come on, you know I'm going to say it! Bullet Journal!! To-Do Lists!! For now, the NOT-To-Do List is essential to my continued rational perspective of my corner of the world!!!

 My bullet journal has a copy of my to-do list. I have some self-imposed deadlines that I will not be meeting unless I really spend lots of time sitting down and focusing on things. I have to decide if I am fine with that idea or if I want to push myself into a frenetic flurry of productivity to get things finished by my deadline.

 My to-do list is growing larger every time I look at it. I have very diverse tasks on that list - shopping for a new car, finishing tasks, grading assignments from my intern, session implementation, self-care, medical issues and appointments, friends who need support, family celebrations, tasks for my self-imposed deadlines, things I have to do, and things I want to do. It is time to sit down and prioritize.

 My not-to-do list is small in comparison to my to-do list. It is time to beef that side of things up. This list includes things that I cannot control, so there is no reason to worry about them - I will spend some time with my bullet journal to flesh out this list today. I find that making this list is cathartic to my emotional brain. I can place things that I carry that are not my burden on this list, and they remain there until I am able to think them through rationally.

 That's why systems are present - to help me through times like this one. Times when my brain gets overwhelmed, and I'm just trying to get through each day, each hour, each step - systems are valuable in these types of times. The last thing I will try on this wonderfully crisp and cool morning is to make something for my enjoyment - I'm inspired by Inktober to draw a bit. I'll see what comes of this!!

 Happy Thursday.

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