Falling Behind in Everything

This week's intern webinar was Self-Care for the Music Therapist. We talked about the importance of taking care of yourself. All of this discussion was happening as I was running a temperature, coughing, and settling into a laryngitis, bronchitis, possibly pneumonia funk. It's kinda ironic that I was leading a discussion about trying to avoid illness and burnout and compassion fatigue while showing that I wasn't able to do those things at this point right now. I was being an example of what NOT TO DO!

I go through something like this every winter. I'm not sure what starts it up or what makes it keep going, but it starts like an allergy attack and then mutates into a bacterial infection. I know that this happens during each winter, but I cannot avoid it. It is inevitable.

Usually, I take a couple of sick days off in order to get over the worst of this involvement, but I can't take time this year. My time is gone, so I went to work yesterday and quarantined myself in the music therapy room. (That's not difficult to do on Fridays since I have no music therapy groups.) I saw four people yesterday who all mentioned that I looked and sounded horrible. I canceled a Skype meeting and a webinar for this weekend because I can only really squeak right now.

I am falling behind in all of my chores, professional responsibilities, and projects. I am exhausted and just want to sleep. I have a major project due for release on March 10th, and I haven't done nearly enough work on it for my liking.

Self-care is such an important thing to think about, not only when I am ill, but all of the time. Self-care encompasses everything important about being human - health, well-being, emotions, relationships, cognition, exercise, social interactions, you name it!

One of the reasons that I talk to others about the importance of self-care is that I need reminders about the importance of self-care. I like to be busy. I want to do it all! I like to push myself to do as much as I can, but my body doesn't like it as much. I have learned about listening to my body before I get to a crisis, but crises happen anyway. A big part of self-care is having a strategy for what you will do when you are sick or stressed to the point of not being able to do what you want to do or need some extra time for yourself.

My self-care strategy for the moment? A cup of herbal tea with honey and lemon. Sitting down to do my work for the one meeting I need to be at this morning. Planning to go to the doctor as soon as that meeting is finished (thank goodness for walk-in services at a primary care physician!!) and starting whatever medication they deem necessary. There will be some shopping at Wal-mart while I wait for my medications to be finished. I'm going to buy some ginger ale, oranges, and cake. After that, I'll be working on the project for March 10th, from my bed, in-between naps and medication.

What will you do to take care of yourself this week? Do it without guilt or shame. Take care of yourself first - always first!

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